


No Reply

by Buttispams



Category: Political RPF - US 21st c.
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Insecurity, Love, M/M, Marriage, otp: wait that's my word
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-19
Updated: 2020-04-19
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:15:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23732947
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Buttispams/pseuds/Buttispams
Summary: Chasten misses Pete and his insecurities get the better of him.
Relationships: Chasten Buttigieg/Pete Buttigieg
Comments: 4
Kudos: 21





	No Reply

**Author's Note:**

> I said one-shots were coming, and I meant it. Stay tuned for more.
> 
> I don't think this is that sad, however, my 'editor' sad that she cried reading it.

Chasten sat anxiously in the airport drafting a text that he so desperately did not want to have to send.

Chasten:  _ I am so sorry, love, my flight’s been delayed, but I’ll be there as soon as I can. _

Chasten ran a shaky hand through his hair. He was currently in Tulsa, Oklahoma, just getting done with a day of visiting LGBTQ+ youth centers. Meanwhile, Peter was doing event after event in Manchester, New Hampshire. They were scheduled to meet that night at Peter’s hotel, giving them an hour or two together, before going to bed. The next day, they were attending an event together, but right after that, Chasten would be leaving for Florida, while Peter traveled to Iowa.

**Peter** :  _ It’s okay, babe, it’s not your fault. At least we'll get to sleep in the same bed, for once. _

Chasten:  _ Yea, lol. _

Chasten:  _ I miss you :| _

**Peter** :  _ I miss you, too. <3 _

Chasten stared down at the texts, concentrating hard on Peter’s last message. Every part of his brain is telling him not to believe it, but his heart is telling him it’s true.  _ Peter still loves me, I’m not losing him,  _ he told himself over and over.

It was all becoming too much. For the past four years all Chasten had to do was hold Peter’s hand, and suddenly all of his doubts and worries would be washed away, but now, just the simple act of holding his husbands hand was becoming more and more impossible.  _ What if he doesn’t want to hold my hand anymore? _

Chasten shook his head with the thought. He just had to see Peter, in person, and everything would be okay.

It had been a week since they’ve been together, and three weeks since they’ve been able to be intimate, besides the pixelated hand jobs that heppened over FaceTime.  _ Maybe all this time apart has made Peter lonely, maybe he found someone better and he’s just waiting for a good time to tell me. Maybe he never even loved me in the first place, and he only stayed with me because I was the first guy to go to bed with him. _

Chasten felt tears well up in his eyes. He squeezed them shut, begging his emotions not to take over in the middle of the airport. He took multiple deep breaths, willing his tears away.

His phone abruptly buzzed in his hand, startling him, making him drop it onto the floor in front of him. He picked it up, opening the text notification.

**Peter** :  _ Oh, and by the way, I love you. _   
  


Chasten smiled at the screen. Peter always knew exactly when to be there for him.

Chasten:  _ I love you too, Peter. _

Chasten picked up his boarding pass, analyzing it. He was meant to leave at 6:00pm, which would’ve meant that he would've gotten to Peter around 12:00-12:30pm, but now his flight had been delayed until 9:30pm, due to tornado warnings in the area, so he wouldn't be seeing his husband until hopefully 3:30am, and of course, they had to be on the road by 8:00am the next day.

Chasten sighed.

He was proud of Peter for everything he was doing, and every time he got to see him talking to supporters on stage, he fell even more in love with him. Chasten also enjoyed his part, being able to travel the country, meeting people with all kinds of life experiences, and more than anything he enjoyed seeing the hope grow in some teenager’s eyes who shared a similar story to his own. He just wished that it wasn’t so hard. This campaign was starting to take an emotional toll on him, bringing back many anxieties that he had in the past, about whether he was good enough, or worth it, for Peter.

Chasten looked at his watch, 7:30pm . He knew he had to do something, he couldn’t spend the next two hours thinking about all of his insecurities.  _ I haven’t eaten anything since breakfast _ , he concluded. So, he grabbed his stuff and made his way to the food court.

Chasten took his time eating, allowing himself to enjoy the food. He didn’t get a lot of time to eat, nowadays, so he decided to take full advantage of it while he could. When he made it back to the gate, he had about 45 minutes until boarding time, and so far there were no more announcements about delays,  _ thank god. _

He decided to pass the time with a game of online Risk.  _ Hmmm,  _ he thought,  _ if it’s after eight here, then it’s an hour later for Peter. Maybe he’s free for a quick game. _

Chasten:  _ Hey, babe, you busy? _

Chasten waited patiently, starting a game with the computer player, to pass the time.

Fifteen minutes later, Peter finally responded.

**Peter:** _ Just got in the car, now. I’m done for the night. What’s up? _

Chasten:  _ Up for a game of Risk? _

**Peter** :  _ I’m always down for a good win. _

Chasten:  _ Yea, okay. When was the last time you won, exactly? _

**Peter** :  _ Just start the game. _

Chasten laughed to himself as he sent Peter the invitation. They played for the next half hour, before Chasten informed Peter that the plane was leaving.

Chasten:  _ Taking off now, I’ll see you in a bit. _

**Peter** :  _ Get here safe. _

Chasten:  _ I love you. _

Chasten was waiting for Peter’s reply when a flight attendant tapped on his shoulder.

“I’m sorry sir, but you’re either gonna have to turn that off, or put it on airplane mode.”

Chasten obliged with a shy smile, clicking on the airplane icon in his settings.

Since it was a close to a six hour flight, Chasten decided to take a sleeping pill, knowing that he would need to get some rest on the plane since he would only get about three hours at the hotel.

Once the plane was in the air he accepted the complimentary drink and pack of shortbread cookies, then he took the pill and closed his eyes.

Unfortunately, during the time it took for the pill to kick in, his mind wandered, once again. 

_ Good thing I had to put my phone on airplane mode, that way I can’t be disappointed by the fact that Peter wasn’t going to respond. Peter’s a good guy, he doesn’t have it in him to lie. He’s not gonna tell me he loves me if he no longer feels it. Just wait, after tomorrow, he’s gonna end it. We never see each other anymore, what’s the point of being in a relationship if you can’t even be together. Peter cares way more about his career than he does about me, he would never put me first before politics. _

Chasten wanted to scream. He wanted to shut off his brain. He wanted to call Peter and hear the truth from him, that he did actually still love him. But Chasten couldn’t do any of that. He wouldn’t even be able to talk to Peter again until the next morning, because by the time the plane landed, Peter would already be asleep, and he needed all the sleep he could get.

Before his mind was able to fill him up with more doubt, the sleeping pill kicked in, and he was out.

Five hours later, he woke up to the sound of the speaker system.

“We will be arriving at Boston-Manchester International Airport in 15 minutes. At this time, please return to your seats, and buckle your seatbelts as we prepare to land.”

Chasten slid his fingers below his glasses as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes. He lowered his hands and checked his watch, 3:32am, it read.  _ Ugh! I won’t be getting to the hotel until 4, if I’m lucky. _ The good thing was his only luggage was carry-on, so he wouldn’t have to wait to pick anything up before leaving.

He took the next couple minutes to make sure he had everything. He unplugged his phone charger, and wrapped up his earbuds, stuffing them back into his bag. He sat in his seat, antsy to land, his leg shaking impatiently.

Finally they landed, and Chasten followed a train of passengers out of the plane and through the terminal. While walking he turned off airplane mode on his phone, giving it a few seconds to buzz with all of the missed notifications. Then, he opened up his messages, refusing to look at Peter’s contact out of fear, and went directly to his most recent message. It was a text from Peter’s team letting him where the car would be to pick him up.

He followed the directions given to him, exiting the building, and finding the black SUV.

Along the way to the hotel, Chasten decided to ease his mind, and check his messages from Peter. He opened his contact and stared at the screen.  _ He never texted back _ . Chasten exited out of the app, then went back in, hoping it would refresh. When there was still no new message, he anxiously restarted his phone.  _ There has to be a text, Peter wouldn’t do that. _ When the screen turned back on, Chasten once again opened his text to Peter, and still, nothing.

He was on the verge of tears.  _ Maybe he really doesn’t love me anymore. _ He was about to fully breakdown, when the driver informed him that they were at the hotel.

Chasten swallowed hard, forcing down the lump in his throat. He thanked the driver, grabbed his stuff, and rushed inside to the front desk, picking up his room key, before swiftly walking to his respected room.

He stopped in front of the door, taking a shaky breath.  _ I don’t care if he loves anymore or not, he’s gonna hold me.  _ At this point, Chasten couldn’t tell if he was more angry, sad, or scared.

He swiped his key card, and pushed open the door. He blindy walked into the dark room, using the light on his phone to find the small table. He slung his computer bag over the chair, slipped off his shoes and took his small suitcase into the bathroom to change and get ready for bed.

A few minutes later he exited the bathroom. He set a couple alarms on his phone, and cautiously crawled into bed with his husband.  _ Not my husband for long.  _ As he moved in closer, Peter slowly awoke.

“Chasten?” He grumbled, sleep filling his voice.

“Yea, babe, it’s me.” Chasten whispered.

“Good.” Peter reached out, taking hold of Chasten, and pulling him in close. He kissed him lightly on the lips. “I missed you, so much.”

“I missed you, too.” Chasten pressed their lips together, again, cradling Peter’s head in his hands.

Peter clung to him tighter, continuing to kiss Chasten, humming into it, when Chasten ran his tongue along Peter’s closed lips.

Chasten slung an arm around his back, rolling Peter on top of him, as he deepened the kiss further.

Peter pushed out of the kiss, moving off of Chasten. “I’m sorry, love, I want this too, so much, but we can’t, not tonight. We have to be up in just a few hours, and we have a full day ahead of us.”

Chasten stayed on his back, staring at the ceiling. “When don’t we,” he scoffed.

Peter pleaded with him. “Chasten, I’m sorry, really, but I promise, I’ll make it up to you.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep.” Chasten replied sharply, as he sat up and moved to sit at the bottom of the bed.

Peter stared intently at Chasten, who faced away from him. He was offended by Chasten’s words, and a little confused by their meaning.

All anger washed away from Peter, and was replaced with concern when he saw Chasten’s shoulders shake with his cries. Peter moved down the bed, and sat next to his husband, pulling him into his chest.

Instantly, Chasten gripped onto him. He buried his face into Peter’s neck, tears falling onto his shoulder, soaking into white cotton. One hand fisted into Peter’s t-shirt as he wrapped his other hand around Peter’s forearm, the pads of his fingers digging into the skin, hard enough to cause bruising.

As much as it hurt, Peter didn’t care. Something was bothering Chasten, and he would do anything to fix it. “Baby, talk to me, what’s going on?”

Chasten shook with audible sobs that escaped his throat. “You’re slipping away from me, Peter, and I can’t handle it. I can’t lose you.”

“You’re not losing me, Chasten.” Peter ran a calming hand through Chasten’s hair, and placed gentle kisses to his head. “I know this is hard, but the only reason I am able to do it, is because I have you.”

Chasten continued to cry, Peter’s words not getting through to him. “You can’t leave me, Peter. You are the only thing in my life with meaning, without you I am nothing.”

“Hey, stop it!” Peter’s voice became stern. He pushed Chasten back, cupping his cheeks, forcing him to look up at him. “First off, I’m not going anywhere. And second, you have so much purpose in your life, not just me. I need you to understand that Chasten.”

Chasten sniffled staring up at Peter. “Okay, yea, I know that.”

“Good.” Peter released a deep sigh, placing a kiss to Chasten’s forehead.

“But if you still love me, then why didn’t you text me back?”

Peter stared back at him in shock. Disappointment brewed inside him, not with Chasten, but with himself, because he caused Chasten to question their relationship. “Wait, hang on, you thought I didn't love you anymore?”

Chasten didn’t respond, he only lowered his eyes in shame.

Peter pulled him back into his chest, needing to hold Chasten close. He pressed his cheek to the top of Chasten's head as tears poured out of his eyes. “Oh god, Chasten...” he cried. “No… sweetie...no… I do love you… I do… more than anything.”

“Then why didn’t you text me back?” Chasten squeaked out.

Peter pulled him back, again. “What are you talking about, Chasten? Of course I texted you back.”

“No, you didn’t. When the plane was taking off, I texted you that I loved you, and you never replied.”

“Yes, Chasten I did. I would never do that to you.” Peter looked desperately at him.

“But you did.” Chasten whimpered.

“No, see?” Peter crawled up the bed, and grabbed his phone from the night stand. 

Chasten watched intently as he swiped open his phone and went into messages, he clicked on Chasten’s icon, and just as Chasten said, he never replied. Instead the words were still in the box on his keyboard. “Oh my god, Chasten, I’m so sorry. I never clicked send, it just saved as a draft.”

Peter kissed Chasten again. “But I do love you, babe, I need you to know that. Please believe me”

“I do Peter.”

He put his phone back onto the bedside table, and collapsed into the bed, resting his head on the pillows, he reached out for Chasten. “Can we please go to bed, now? I don’t want to think about anything, anymore.”

Chasten laid beside him, dropping his head onto Peter’s chest, and draping an arm across his stomach. “I wish I could see you more.”

Peter rubbed circles on Chasten’s back. “I know, I do too, love.”

Silent moments passed, and Chasten was on the verge of sleep, thinking that Peter was too, but then he spoke. “Chasten?”

“Yes, Peter?”

“I really do love you.”

“I know, and I love you, too.” Chasten turned his head and kissed Peter’s chest, right over his steadily beating heart, before settling back in, and falling asleep.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> As much as it pains me to think about this, I feel that this scenario is very realistic, considering Pete and Chasten's busy life on the trail. Thank God they're spending a lot of time together now.
> 
> Check out my Pete and Chasten fan account on Twitter @Buttispams


End file.
